


The Laughing Spider

by IantoLives



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Chuck (TV) if you squint, Gen, Pre-Season/Series 04, Spider?, What Spider?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-27 04:46:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12073806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IantoLives/pseuds/IantoLives
Summary: The one where the Spider was in total control of the web and was pulling more strings than anyone knew.ORWhat the Spider really thought about the Holmes brothers.





	The Laughing Spider

"Come into my parlour," said the Spider to the fly.

The Spider sat motionless in the center the web. Those Holmes boys were ever so much fun! They were dancing to the Spider's tune and didn't even know it. It was heady and delicious. 

Sherlock had a mind palace, Magnussen had his subterranean vault and who knew what dear Mycroft called his, probably he had a facsimile of the Bodleian Library in his head. How quaint they all were, how small minded. There was a whole computer's worth of data in the Spider's head, in addition to the massive intellect already there. It was called the Intersect. Americans were so tech obsessed yet left themselves so vulnerable. The Spider chuckled, pun intended, but back to musing about those Holmes brothers. They made the world marginally less dull.

It was Sherlock's deductions about little Carl Powers' death that first attracted the Spider. That was the first strand of the web to attach itself to them. There were so many more now. 

Sherlock was brilliant but always seemed to get at least one thing wrong. Once in a very long while it WAS twins. Oh, he was quite correct that Moriarty had died on the roof of Bart's. He didn't deduce that it was the wrong one. He didn't know that Moriarty had a twin. A goldfish who had believed his gun to be loaded with blanks.

Sherlock was an imbecile at times. He had no filters and next to no social skills. He ran roughshod over friends and foes alike. He was like a whirling tornado, leaving massive destruction in his wake but capable of pinpoint accuracy at times, touching down to destroy his target and dispersing leaving little to no collateral damage. 

The spider used Sherlock to cut away those parts of the web that were too weak or hopelessly tangled. He was such a useful tool! Jefferson Hope came to mind and Irene Adler, and Charles Magnussen, each in their own way starting to attract too much attention. Sherlock cut the fat to the bone in Eastern Europe, thinking he was destroying the web. He left the Spider with a much sleeker operation and increased profits.

The spider appreciated Mycroft Holmes. Mycroft was marginally smarter than Sherlock but equally easy to manipulate. He'd traded away his baby brother's life story and in exchange all he got were a few useless tidbits of outdated information. 

Mycroft's weakness, his pressure point, was Sherlock. If he'd stop constantly constantly worrying about the baby brother who'd cried over Redbeard, and treated him as a responsible adult, Sherlock would act more like a responsible adult. If Sherlock had Mycroft's respect and regard he wouldn't be constantly showing off and grandstanding. 

If Mycroft had read Sherlock in on Bond Air when he'd first caught wind of the missing bodies Irene wouldn't have been able to trick him into revealing the plan.

If Mycroft had told Sherlock he was bait for Magnussen, had told him of the raid that was planned, he wouldn't have committed murder. If Sherlock had been in on the whole plan, Sherlock would have been wired for sound, and Mycroft would have heard everything. He'd have known there weren't any actual vaults under Appledore and could have safely sent in the troops.

Now Mycroft was sending Sherlock on a suicide mission. 

The spider wasn't going to let the Iceman throw away his plaything! Only the Spider got to choose when and if Sherlock was cut from the web! The spider had a contingency plan. There were contingency plans for the contingency plans.

Timing was everything. The spider waited for Sherlock's plane to be up in the air and set the plan in motion. The whole web was vibrating violently and the chaos rolled out like a tidal wave.

The spider sat back and laughed! 

"Did you miss me?"

"Did you miss me?"

"Did you miss me?"


End file.
